We went in for our scheduled first ultrasound yesterday morning. Frankly, I had prepared myself for bad news. In the past three days or so, I had not felt pregnant at all. No sore boobs, no fatigue, nothing. I felt "pre-pregnant." I was convinced they would not be able to find a heartbeat and the depression would begin.
I went in and they did a complete physical (I had gained 3 lbs. since finding out I am pregnant), and also did a Pap Smear. Then it was time for the ultrasound. He immediately found the baby. It looked like a little kidney bean with a massive heart beating very fast. I stared in amazement. I couldn't believe that little heart was beating inside of me. This entire pregnancy became a big reality at that moment. I looked up at hubby -- who was looking over my shoulder at the screen too -- and he smiled. I was transfixed at this little beating heart. The doc froze the screen and measured the baby. Then he started to move around again, and immediately said, "Oh, and here's a second heartbeat!"
WHAT? Second heartbeat? TWINS!
All of my tact went out the door at that moment, and I yelled out, "Oh shit!" (Apparently, I yelled this louder than I thought because when we exited the exam room, all of the nurses were giggling at me in the hallway and wishing me congratulations.)
So there they were...two little kidney beans with massive hearts beating rapidly! Fear washed over me. This is a high risk pregnancy due to my diabetes. I am terrifed. I have no idea how I am going to care for two babies at once. I need some time to really let this digest.
Hubby was cool, calm and collected. He is excited and saying he knew it all along. I am shocked. Scared. Overwhelmed. I just can't believe it!
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